by Don’t you hate it when people think it’s perfectly okay to share unsolicited comments about other people’s bodies?
Whether it’s about weight, size, equipment. Who asked your opinion? why do you care
Unfortunately, body shaming is ubiquitous, even on dating apps. Because according to a nationwide survey commissioned by OriGymOne in three women has been fat-shamed and received unsolicited comments about their bodies on dating apps.
There are countless stories on TikTok of plus size women facing extreme hostility and unwanted comments about losing weight and hitting the gym on dating apps. The hashtag “Fatshaming” currently has almost 400 million views on the app.
Kerry McAvoy took to the social media platform to express her frustration, saying: “I’ve seen the same extreme hostility expressed on dating apps and social media by those looking for someone ‘matching’ towards those whom they deem unsuitable.”
“It’s like everyone is considered a consumable and you’re judged on your level of sexiness and hotness. Humans are not consumable. Your perception of beauty is your own and varies from person to person,” she added.
She then goes on to say that if these “unfit” people don’t meet that particular standard of beauty, they’re made to believe they don’t deserve to be in any place.
According to the Weight Stigma Study, more than 1 in 6 plus-size users have experienced weight discrimination. While only 4% of the “underweight” and 3% of the “thin” received the same treatment.
It’s even worse for plus-size women, with 1 in 3 women who dress size 16 and over saying they’ve experienced weight shame on a dating app. Statistics also showed that women are more likely than men to be body-shamed by their family members.
Due to the rise of swipe-based dating apps, daters are now prioritizing looks when choosing a potential partner. Seeing an endless stream of faces and bodies seemingly has a negative effect and encourages users to become more critical.
According to some stats released by the dating app bumblebee, Nearly 9 in 10 people feel that dating is a space where they feel more physically judged than in other areas of life, with 1 in 4 saying they have been physically shamed online on a dating app or on social media.
Over half (58%) of people under the age of 34 have even admitted to canceling a date because of physical insecurities.
Naomi Walkland, Bumble’s UK & Ireland head, said her body-shaming policy was put in place for precisely this reason.
“Body anxiety can have a huge impact on how people date, which is why our body shaming policy is so important. We hope that our zero tolerance policy for racist, hateful speech, abusive behavior and harassment helps people on Bumble feel empowered to be their authentic selves, comfortable and confident,” says Walkland.
Shaming someone can have a profound impact on their mental and physical well-being. And you’re doing them a disservice by commenting on how they look or appear.
Nobody appreciates unwanted comments – be it about their work, life or everyday tasks. Nobody likes being told what to do or how to do it. So why make comments about someone’s body?
“I think that reflects something very fractured in our society,” says McAvoy, “It’s not about people’s weight or fitness, it’s really about the attitude that we have about someone’s worth.”
Bottom line: keep your unsolicited comments about someone else’s body to yourself.
