by Oscars 2023 host Jimmy Kimmel predictably took aim at Will Smith’s infamous stroke during his opening monologue.
The late-night talk show host didn’t stop there, however.
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tom cruise, Babylon and the Academy itself also found itself in the target of Kimmel’s jokes on Sunday night (March 12).
Here are all of his best jokes from the night.
“If someone commits an act of violence in this theater at any point during the show, you will be awarded the Academy Award for Best Actor.”
“We want you to have fun, feel safe and most of all we want me to feel safe,” Kimmel told the audience. Kimmel’s predecessor, Chris Rock, was the one who received Smith’s slap in the face last year after making a joke at the expense of his wife, Jada Pinkett Smith
“So we have strict guidelines. If someone commits an act of violence in this theater at any point during the show, you will be awarded the Oscar for Best Actor and given a 19-minute speech. But seriously, the academy has a crisis team. If something unpredictable or violent happens during the show, sit and do absolutely nothing. Maybe even hug the attacker.”
“And if either of you get mad at a joke and decide to cheer with it — it’s not going to be easy,” Kimmel concluded, yelling at his proposed defense attorneys as he would in the audience Believe Star Michael B Jordan and Michelle Yeoh.
“What do you think he is, a woman?”
Kimmel addressed the Oscars’ lack of diversity by using James Cameron’s snub in the Best Director category.
“Avatar: The Way of Water‘ Kimmel said. “I mean, why doesn’t the Academy nominate the guy who directed it avatar? What do you think he is, a woman?”
‘Are the band of ‘Babylon’ here?’
Damien Chazelle’s star-studded 2022 flop, Babylon, wasn’t sure either. “There are things movies can do that TV just can’t do. For example, a TV show cannot lose $100 million. Is the gang off? Babylon Here? You know. I just asked if I would welcome them!”
Some people couldn’t help but feel that the dig was a little tough.
“I can’t help but wonder, ‘Is Ozempic right for me?’
Kimmel had to poke fun at Hollywood’s new wonder drug, Ozempic. The diabetes drug’s popularity as a weight loss method has only surged amid reports of its widespread use in the entertainment industry and on social media.
“Everyone looks so great. As I look around this room, I can’t help but wonder, “Is Ozempic right for me?”
“It makes you kinda miss the slapping”
Two hours into the Oscars’ live broadcast, Kimmel joked, “At this point in the show, you kind of miss the slap, don’t you?
“Let’s take you back on that Spirit Airlines flight”
It might not have been Kimmel’s funniest moment of the night, but picking up Jenny the donkey Banshees by Inisherin on stage was an undisputed highlight.
“Jenny is not only an actress, she is also a certified emotional support donkey,” Kimmel said. “If you’re upset, anxious, or just just love mules, feel free to hug them.”
Matt Damon ‘smells like dog medicine’
Kimmel reignited his nearly two-decade feud with Matt Damon at the Oscars. He asked Jessica Chastain in the audience, “Was it difficult to make your movie? The Martian because your co-star Matt Damon can’t read and smells like dog medicine?”
“I didn’t really have a lot of scenes with him, so it was fine,” Chastain replied.
The full list of 2023 Oscar nominees and winners can be found here.
